Never again.

Never again, will I allow someone to make me question my worth. My beauty. My ability to live and love without them. I gave that stupid fuck another chance only to find he had rotted even more into his self imposed early death, with a diet from hell and an alcohol problem to boot.  While he was out finding attention at bars from strangers he can't remember, I was growing, I was learning and I was becoming a higher consciousness..  I allowed his digressions to take away from my growth and development. I have come so far in self love, from a regular gym memeber and a traveling life loving woman who takes care of others... Back into a self loathing dependant girl friend. Used for an ego boost and orgasm fun. Like a fucking whore. I was nothing more than a item to him. He never loved me, he started everything with Lies, the first and second and third chance he got.  Never again .. NEVER AGAIN. DAVE SACK OF SHIT... I AM THRU WITH YOU. .. 

 I have so much potential, I am extraordinary, I am magnificent. I held the hand of my sister and slept next to her while she died... while no one else knew what to do. I can be anything I want in this life... I want to be loved, and adored and .. oh man I have survived so much I need to heal and feel all the things I was never allowed. I hope I come out on the other side with a story to tell the loved ones I'm stuck here doing this without... I won't be alone forever, I know my worth, I don't seek attention from anyone and everyone.. I know my time will come. My security... A love that is not built around a bunch of bullshit lies and minipulation.. I never had an honest lover... 

What do I write a book about??? Healing? Hurting ? Abuse? Surviving abuse? Abandonment? .. me? .. I'll write a book about me. .. For now let's blog and get thru the shift .... It's been real. It's been emotional, I feel so empty sometimes, so full of love and life others.. I just love you Veronica Flynn, you are my hero. Thanks for having my back when no one else does...